When to Leave a Co-Write

The obvious answer to the question of when to leave a co-write is "when the song is done." This is true 99% of the time. However, there are a few instances in which you can head out early.

First and foremost, you should feel okay leaving a co-write if your safety is in question. In my heyday as a publisher, I had many women clients who I would schedule sessions for. These sessions were with many songwriters and producers who were kindhearted people. But, sometimes, a woman songwriter gets put into uncomfortable positions by misogynistic men who proposition them. I want to make something clear for women who read this newsletter: it is well within your right to leave a co-write if you're feeling mistreated or dehumanized by men in the writer's room.

Another situation you may want to plan an escape for is one in which another writer is inherently antagonistic. I once worked with a writer who walked into a co-write with a man he did not know. Within ten minutes, this man told the writer everyone that was wrong with his music and that he could help him write songs that were actually good. The energy was antagonistic and the conversation amounted to bullying. If you find yourself in a position like this, find an excuse and leave.

Just as racism and prejudice abound in corporate offices, these lesser elements of society can be found in writer's rooms. I've heard stories of writer's experiencing anti-semitic language or having to sit in rooms and men expressing homophobic sentiment. If the environment feels safe, I encourage you to call out this type of behavior. If not, I encourage you to leave. No one should have to subject themselves to racism and prejudice in their place of work.

The songwriting community does not exist in a corporate office so most folks are forced to go without a human resources department. Lacking a means of issuing a formal complaint against other writers, sometimes the only thing for us to do is leave.

Your Assignment:
Know when to leave.

Writers, these types of situations don't come up that often. But, I do want to normalize that these are situations you might come across in the workplace. Have a plan in place before you encounter these types of behaviors, so that you can have an easier time leaving.

- Judy Stakee